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The Prosecution: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of 10 years, Marielle, labels herself the “content queen”. It’s fun for a bit, but it weighs on our relationship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything constantly. When we eat out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when other people see her posing or filming – I experience vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates video blogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be involved. Sometimes I'm captured while dining, or simply tagging along. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I might be no makeup on, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also expects me to record her at inopportune moments. Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me being her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my discomfort about this arrangement, she brushed it off. I've been invited to several brand events, which was nice, but that doesn’t make up for all the energy I invest assisting her make content.

I appreciate that she has supported me with my career in design, but I don’t want our connection to become just a ledger of favours. I don’t feel she’s fake or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me smiling with someone. It’s so silly. I need her to understand that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being filmed, edited, or shared for an audience. I am not a prop for her online persona.

The Other Side: Marielle

I want my friend to see that the creations we make together can get us a foot in the door.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your interests. I admire people on TikTok who execute that aesthetic of informal, self-made content creation.

Creating content is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, sharing them with an audience that appreciates the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make my friend uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, giving her a chance to experience exclusive moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not blackmail, it's simply being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see the benefits the content we make together can get us: an opening. I understand not everyone likes being on camera, but often unplanned moments is what makes content genuine. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my private filmmaker, but friends help each other in minor capacities. My assumption was recording a short video here or there would be enjoyable for Beth. Innovation thrives in partnership, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I cherish Beth’s friendship deeply and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to compromise: like asking before recording, and steering clear of shots that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about control, it’s about sharing my world while still considering hers. Obviously content creation is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop recording herself and her friend when they are socializing?

Nothing is more excruciating than having a friend point a camera at you. I understand that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Perhaps she can find like-minded creators to create content with. Given the dark, looming future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for assistance every time, even if they have helped previously. While she enjoys shooting, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She needs to honor her friend's personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everybody. It was kind she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Foster some authentic memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she’s working. Each appears confused as to what’s reasonable. The answer is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing defined boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an acceptable compromise.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been over-exposing their bond?